Yes, I am alive!

Hello again, world. I figured I’d really better resume blogging, because otherwise when I meet up with people I get all these comments about my apparently-now-infamous previous blog entry. Hmph. Ok I have been wanting to blog - there’re alot of things to think about these days - but the secret trivial random reason why I’ve been delaying rescuing this poor blog from sex-and-babies infamy is that I’ve been waiting for someone to email me a photo of my girls and April and me from two weeks ago so I can include it in an entry about them but there’ve been technical problems on that front so I shall just give up and declare right now that:

I AM SO PROUD OF MY BABY TEAM (ok sorry girls  but you ARE 14 and below) for winning the Youth-14 Championship, haha. How does it feel like to win your very first competition, eh. *beams proudly* Although I must say, I have never had the fortune - or misfortune, depending on how you look at it - of coaching a sane team. Every team I’ve ever coached has exhibited very strange behaviour indeed. The last competition team - or, as they Ah Lian-ly call themselves, “Team xXx” - was hilarious in a very typical SCGS, bimbotic way. This baby team, however, gives a whole new meaning to the word “bizarre”. Of course, they’ve had their fair share of SCGS moments, like running up the stage after being announced champions and running back down without the championship shield, but on the whole, April and I are still trying to figure out what type of hilarious this team is, with no success in sight.

I could create whole catalogue of bizarre moments, but my favourite 3 are:

1. While waiting in the RJC auditorium for the announcement of the quarterfinalists. Amanda and Peiwei start fighting over the squeezable bottle of honey I bought them to tide their throats through a demanding day.

Amanda: Give me the honey!
Peiwei: No.
Amanda: I want the honey!
Peiwei: No.
Things go on in a similar vein until I ask Peiwei why she won’t give Amanda the honey.
Peiwei: Because I want to squeeze the bottle.
Amanda: I WANT THE HONEY. SHIRIN! MAKE HER GIMME THE HONEY!
Amanda makes a grab for the bottle and all is chaos in the RJ auditorium and April and I swiftly pretend we are the coaches of some other team.

2. The team reference to the toilet as “The Magical Place”. So that I keep having to say yes to requests like, “Shirin, can I/we go to The Magical Place?” in the midst of my training. But that was nothing compared to the look on Lucas’s face when, as he was telling me about the culture of orgies in some US university (WHY he was telling me about such things in front of my girls, I cannot remember), Charmaine grabbed the teammate next to her and shrieked (and you have not heard a shriek till you’ve heard Charmaine shriek), “Let’s go to The Magical Place!”

Poor Lucas. I hope you’ve recovered. And I hope I remembered to stop laughing and explain to you that she meant the toilet.

3. During training. Amanda, heavily oppressed by my strict rule against chocolate in all forms, fried food in all forms and anything else that threatens throat-health, starts ranting at me, “Shirin! After the competition on Saturday! I am going to Swensens! And buying 2 Topless Fives! So it’ll be TOPLESS TEN! AND YOU CANT STOP ME!

Amanda then flounces out of the room to rehearse her speech. Charmaine of the Big Innocent Eyes
asks, “Shirin, what’s a Topless Five?” and I whisper conspiratorially, “It’s a striptease show, Charmaine.” Just as Charmaine’s eyes get wider than they already are and the others start laughing, Amanda flounces back in, oblivious to the conversation taking place, and resumes her rant at me, “And the Topless Ten will all be CHOCOLATE ICE CREAM!” and then flounces back out again. So I tell Charmaine, “It’s 10 naked men covered in chocolate ice cream.” Now Charmaine looks near suicidal and Amanda, still oblivious to the conversation, pokes her head in a third time and yells, “With lots of NUTSSSS!”

HAHA. April says I corrupt the kids. But they were halfway there in the first place and will get there anyway, and in any case, Amanda has probably broken all records for Perviness at 14. And for some reason, she has thanked April and me on her blog for providing her with marijuana. Whattttt. I could be flogged by Fifi (the teacher-in-charge) for this.

Ok more news another time!

Exam whine

Oh gosh. It is always this time of the year that I feel absolutely convinced that I was born to do nothing else but to get married and have lots of sex and babies.

Can’t wait for Friday!

Rough paper

Yesterday, while looking for rough paper on which to start scribbling Admin Law mindmaps, the only rough paper I could find were documents relating to It - a printed copy of the offer, info I printed out about the different aspects of it, a printed copy of the email.

There were still some I couldn’t bear to look at, but I pulled a few sheets gingerly out of the stack, lay them flat on my table, and stared at them for awhile. Especially at the exuberant exclamation mark behind the “Congratulations”, the name in bold font, the field I had finally clicked on. And then I turned the sheets over, pressed the words I could no longer see into my desk, and filled with blank other side with Judicial Review, errors of law going to jurisdiction, Anisminic, Page v Hull, MPPP , Stansfield and lots of arrows in between.

世上只有妈妈好

My friend was so right when she said that the past really bites you out of the blue, at the most unexpected moments. Getting invited to that event (which I ultimately didn’t go for - wise choice, as it turns out) somehow triggered this wave of emo-ing not just about H but about every it’s-complicated in my history. Th emo for some reason reached a peak last night (maybe because I decided to re-read the diaries I kept at that age, which has all of the it’s-complicateds documented in them, eew). So, in the depths of emo, my mom came into my room, and I said, “Mommy, I’m emo”, complete with sad face.

“Isn’t emu a kind of animal?”

And then I couldn’t stop laughing. In between laughing fits my sis and I explained to her what emo means, but she didnt seem too abashed. In fact, she quite gleefully declared, “See, I’ve cheered you up!”, patted my head fondly, and exited the room looking very pleased with herself.

Aiyoh, my mom is so cute sometimes. I am now emo-ing about all the times I’ve been a less than good daughter to her and my dad. WHY AM I SO EMO?

MY GIRLS!

I’ve got sunshine on a cloudy day.
When it’s cold outside I’ve got the month of May.
I guess you’d say
What can make me feel this way?
My girl (my girl, my girl)
Talkin’ ’bout my girl (my girl).

I’ve got so much honey the bees envy me.
I’ve got a sweeter song than the birds in the trees.
I guess you’d say
What can make me feel this way?
My girl (my girl, my girl)
Talkin’ ’bout my girl (my girl).

If you change all the “girl”s in the above corny song to “girls”, that pretty much sums up how I feel right now, haha.

Last Thursday I went down to coach, as usual, and after training, the team presented me with this:

and this:

which, on the other side, has individual notes from each member of the team to me:

.

AWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW.

That made my day, made my week, is still making my month, and will probably make my entire coaching career. I can’t think of anything in the world I would give in exchange for reading those 5 notes, which really makes every single sacrifice I’ve made as a coach worthwhile. It’s so so gratifying to know that I’ve actually made an impact on their lives, not just in terms of debating - even though debating does require alot of strength of character both as individuals and as members of a team - but in terms of the people they’ve become and say they will be because of what I’ve taught. It really puts alot of things in perspective.

I just don’t know what to say except to sit here glowing with happiness. So I shall leave you with a few of the gazillion photos I’ve taken of the collage and the bouquet!

   

    

Random close-up shots of parts of the collage:

Hee=)

Ok I’m off to coach now! Equity assignment bescrewed.

Everybody’s gotta learn sometime

When can you tell that whatever in your body/mind/wherever is responsible for regulating your emotions is really confused? When your moods are entirely determined by the songs you listen to. Lately I can go from completely bubbliciously happy listening to this:

 

to very emo and contemplative listening to this:

and backagain! And again. And again. And again. You get the idea.

Most immediately recently, however, it’s the latter that dominates. Because of a variety of triggers, I’ve been thinking about a number of past relationships/it’s complicateds (Ok, more it’s-complicateds than relationships). It mildly disturbs me that nearly 5 years after it ended - and I mean REALLY REALLY ended, not fake ended as part of a wider and very persistent start-stop-try-again pattern), I get an invitation to an event at which I am likely to see him up close for a few hours and I am actually tempted to go. ARGH. WHYYYYY? Actually I know why. Because part of me, the very irrational part of me, still secretly (or not so secretly now I’ve put it here) fantasizes about the day he sees me RESPLENDENTLY AND BREATHTAKINGLY BEAUTIFUL and freaking regrets everything that he did, down to the last neuron in his jerk-brain. Now who am I kidding. But I think everyone to some extent has similar fantasties regarding jerk-ish ex-it’s-complicateds.

And then there is the less complicated one. Aiyah, that one. Sigh. Everybody’s gotta learn sometime but evidently some people still have some learning to do.

Why am I blogging when my scary Equity assignment is due tomorrow, at exactly the same time that my mock LCS negotiation is scheduled, and I picked which question I wanna do on Tuesday afternoon. Not that I really had a choice, because Q3 required research, and Q2 is about investment trusts (investment! As if trusts are not scary enough they have to have trusts PLUS investment, omg). So Q1 and family trusts it is. We’ll stick with the family and providing for those for whom you feel deep love and affection and hopefully not because you want to defraud your creditors, please.

P.S. And Dedi just came to tell me, “just to make you feel worse!”, that a certain someone whose name begins with V and ends with ikram finished footnoting last week. FOOTNOTING. LAST WEEK. But then again he is Lord V_____ whom any law firm would hire right now if not for the Legal Profession Act.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY ANGELA ANG JIE LING!

I MISS YOU I MISS YOU I MISS YOU. It sucks not to able to be with you on your 21st birthday, but i’m wishing you happiness with all my heart. When you come back, I’ll get you two big presents ok, to make up for this birthday as well as the last hahaha. We’ll FINALLY get down to our long-intended shopping trip to buy each other long overdue birthday presents.

Last night I was looking through the entry you wrote in my autograph book when we left Sec 4, and I was overwhelmed with nostalgia and deep deep affection for you *awwww*. Hard to believe we’ve come so far - from way back when I promised myself that if I got onto the same team as you, I’d quit debates (HAHA). Here’s to many many many more years of best-friendship! I LOVE YOU BFF <3 <3 <3

P.S. Given that it’s your 21st birthday, and you know what people do on 21st birthdays, I thought I might as well remind you of what I always say and what I would repeat if I were there with you: YOUR LIVER LOVES YOU. But not as much as I do.

Birthdays and birthdays

March was a month full of friends’ birthdays, so after the string of emo posts over the past couple opf months, this is going to be a glorious brainless CAMWHORING post.

Birthday the First: Combined birthday bash for Kox, Mich, Jo Joy and Jon, at Brewerkz

        

Oh and Deb and I really like this one (taken impromptu by Di)! Looks like it’s a photo from the brochure of an emo play or something (if you crop Chris Kang out) hahah.

Birthday the Second: Tat’s, at his (very beautiful) home

Team reunion! In order of speaker line-up, hahaha

The gays and the girl - still the same after all these years

Birthday the Third: Derek’s, on a picnic mat at Fort Canning! Otherwise known as Robin Teo’s highly successful maiden attempt at masterminding a surprise birthday party, haha

Everybody loves Derek

Our boys were always crazy

Me and the birthday boy who, apart from being lobster-red in this photo, is also probably the most giving guy on the face of this planet. We love you, Deek=)

Birthday the Fourth: Di’s surprise party, at Riciotti @ The Riverwalk, masterminded by yours truly, hee=p

Mats and Minahs!

 

My favourite Mat!

With the presents and those who bought the presents

Sexcited

Patrick weighing his imaginary boobs

JUST LOOK AT THE DESSERTS COUNTER

And they ended up on our table…=)

 

Girlfriendssssssss (Kox negotiable)

Ok I might as well get Facebook.

My first faint!

Ok so I wanted to blog intelligently about the IMF seminar I attended last night, but then this intervened: I fainted for the first time in my life. Haha! I was feeling perfectly well until I slipped down the stairs at home, sat down heavily on my butt, then got up really quickly cos my parents rushed to me and I didn’t want them to worry. Then my dad asked me if I was ok, I said I was, and then the next thing I knew was that I was lying in my dad’s arms at the bottom of the stairs, everything was a blur, my mum was giving me water, my dad was wetting my face, and even through the blur I could feel his panic cos he wasn’t so much holding me as clutching me very closely to him. After the blur cleared and I was fully conscious again, they told me I’d fainted face-down on the stairs, hitting my chin and then my forehead on the edge of a step.

The funny thing is, I totally had a dream while I was unconscious! My mom says that can’t be cos I was unconscious for like 10 seconds, but I really remember having a happy dream such that when I woke up, I felt vaguely annoyed in the exact same way you feel annoyed when the alarm clock interrupts a happy dream. I can’t remember now exactly what I dreamed, though.

And now that it’s all over, I feel so thankful that I didn’t sustain more injuries than I did. I shudder to think how much more severely I could have been injured given that I fell face down. I could have broken my nose instead of hitting my chin, I could have hit my eye on the step instead, I could have bitten my tongue when I fell on my chin, etc etc. But as it is, the skin on my chin and forehead isn’t even broken, just a little red. I’m so thankful! Can you imagine how ugly it would be if I had scraped skin on my face? *bimbo eeew*

Even more funnily, my faint precipitated a most bizarre team reunion. Cos I called Robin to tell him I’d fainted and thus was under Paternal Orders to sleep, so I’d have to call him the day after instead to tell him what I promised I’d tell him. And Tat was with him in his bedroom! With Tat yelling, “Adek, Robin and I are sleeping together! You wanna join us?” I almost fainted again. Then Robin said, “Hey what do you think if Tat dates this girl who…” and I almost fainted yet again, in response to which Robin said, “Is it that scary that Tat dates a girl? Oh ya actually it is” and then I heard, “F*** you,” in the background, and then, “Tell her to see a doctor.” Then the two boys nagged me for awhile to see a doctor before we ended the phone call. Talk of a bizarre team reunion! Although once again without Son We should have a proper proper team reunion soon while Son is back in Singapore.

Haha ok now I’m damn scared to call Robin today like I’m supposed to, cos he’ll probably be having his afterglow after his night with Tat. And you wonder why, a long long time ago, in a debate where my team was proposing allowing gay couples to adopt, I concluded my speech with, “Therefore, if Robin and Tat want to adopt a kid, they should definitely be allowed to.” Poor kid, though.

It hasn’t been six months

And the shore I was struggling towards has disappeared, but the water is still beautiful.

And the world continues relentlessly on.

And she left - no miracle interceded. The traffic on the way to the cemetery was just like traffic before she left, the drizzle was like any other rain, lunch after the funeral tasted the same as lunches at that place have always tasted. And yet, looking upon her face just before the shroud’s embrace, and listening to her husband’s account, I realise that her going, after all, was the miracle.

And the world, as always, continues carelessly on.